Honey, the splinter slayer!

It’s Tuesday! I awoke his morning without a single idea as to what to write. Was I worried? 

Not at all. 

Like all procrastination-prone writers I knew inspiration would speak to me any time now…any time…uhh.

Sometimes inspiration comes as a small voice, like an idea that repeats itself softly until you grab on to it and say “Yeah! That’s what I’ll talk about.”

Other times it is loud, like in the form of a friend saying “Hey, I'm sick. What's good for this?"

This week, I got nothing.

Six o’clock rolled around. Still nothing.

Come on, inspiration.

Then it hit.

 In a flash of pain.

On this particularly beautiful and summer-esque day I decided to walk across the porch barefoot.

The old,

warped,

splinter-ridden

porch.

If this was my first year here, it would have caused bad blood between the house and I. Fortunately, I have lived here much longer, and love this beautiful old house very much. And by old, I mean 1825. Really, old.

So, no hard feelings.

Just a little pain.

I pulled out most of the splinter, but the ouchie persisted. Upon closer inspection I saw that a little bit of the original splinter it was still happily tucked there deep in my skin.

Ouch.

And yet, at the same time, this was the moment I was waiting for.

YES!

This is my perfect time to test honey.

Honey, you ask?

Yes, honey.

I learned at least a year ago that honey is good for pulling out stubborn splinters.

Honey???

Yes, let me explain why.

Honey is astringent, which means it sucks the water out of stuff. Imagine licking the green peel of a banana. Kinda puckers your mouth.

Now imagine you are microscopic bacteria, and the tiny bit of water that is in your body is all the life liquid you have in the world. A giant avalanche of honey comes, and in a glump, pulls out all the liquid inside of you and kills you. Laughing manically the whole time.

That’s why honey is anti-bacterial.

And with splinters, it sucks all the water out of the surrounding cells, and with a heave ho, it pushes the splinter up and out.

At least in theory. Today I get to put it to the test.

I am sitting on this beloved, but slightly more warily suspicious, porch with my foot tucked up in a lotus-like position with a glop of honey on the bottom of my foot.

No progress so far.

My foot has fallen asleep, though.

On top of killing all the bacteria in your cough-ridden throat, when you take a teaspoon of it, and coaxing stubborn splinters out, honey is good for a lot of other stuff as well;

Put directly on the sore, it helps heal external ulcers, wounds, cold sores, genital herpes sores, cysts, and other stubborn-healing sores.

Inside, it soothes the stomach and digestive tract. It also gives energy, and balances your electrolytes. Go, sports! Also, when sickness is so severe that diarrhea and vomiting is occurring and your own vital human fluids are running dangerously low.

And best of all, honey is an amplifier for the natural remedy it’s paired with! So add a touch of sweet honey to that peppermint/comfrey/raspberry/chamomile or whatever herbal remedy you are drinking this morning.

Just a spoon full of Honey helps the medicine go down!

AND, it never goes bad!

Tomorrow I’ll let you know how it goes!

Until then, may you take care of yourself happily.