Apples in my coffee cup

Happy Daylight Savings Time!

You know I love getting that extra hour to sleep in the fall...almost as much as I hate losing that hour in the spring.

Monday, the first day back to work after the time change, I woke groggy, sleep deprived, and for all intents and purposes- a zombie until roughly around noon. Tuesday wasn't much better.

For all of us 6-7am risers. After months of waking up first in winter darkness. Then slowly, each day waking to a little more sunlight, and a little more hope. All the sudden we are now plunged back into the cruel world of dark mornings. As we begrudgingly rise from our warm beds and in a whine wonder why we have to wake up when even the sun gets to keep sleeping.

If you wake up before 6am, you have my deepest sympathy.
If you wake up after, and can still make it on time to your work or school, then I want your job.


So how do you wake up when it's hard to get up. How, oh how?

There are the usual you can reach for, Coffee, mocha, energy drinks, black or green tea, even 5 hour energy. The unfortunate thing about this is that all these contain caffeine.

Now in the grand spectrum of human vices, caffeine ranks much closer to stealing the last cookie out of the cookie jar, rather than Hitler's atrocities.

But caffeine is still addictive. Something that your body can function just fine without, but once it develops that dependency, it's about as much fun to break as voluntarily pulling your own teeth.

So are there any alternatives? You ask, like a damsel in distress on the streets of comic book New York as (name villain here) comes stomping down the way to wreak havoc and gleeful destruction.

In comes herbs in the form of...apples!

Yup, that's right folk. Flying around the corner, here to save the day are Apples!

And all this time you thought it was just a fruit!

I was told that apples are a natural source of caffeine, roughly equal to a small cup of coffee. I've tried this, and have felt a natural uplifting, an alertness, and increase in energy after chomping down the fruit. All the things coffee is supposed to do, but for some reason in me, the caffeine in coffee sends me bouncing off walls like the Tasmanian Devil.

Apples, for me, has the positives of caffeine, without turning me into a three-foot tall tornado that can't speak syllables without throwing slobber against the far wall.

What else are apples good for? Well, I'm glad you asked!

Let's start in your mouth.

• While chewing the apple, it's like a natural toothbrush for your teeth, clearing away the gunk, and polishing those pearly whites. (good for after lunch, it's a caffeine pick-me-up as well as floss)

• You are also putting a bunch of minerals and vitamins in your body. Especially good if you are anemic, or going to donate blood soon. I always have to make sure I eat iron-rich foods before I give blood, because my natural iron levels (like many ladies) are fairly low.
• There are certain substances within apples that helps prevent inflammations, good if you are prone to asthma attacks or heart disease, it'll discourage your airways (or blood vessels) from sealing up under stress. Warning: This being said, please do not shove an apple in someone's mouth if they are having an asthma attack. For some reason I feel that would make it worse. 
• There are antioxidants in apples that like to kick the butts of any possible cancer inside of us. 

Apples have both soluble, and insoluble fiber. Which are like janitors. We've all been in messy, neglected places that could use a good cleaning (bathrooms at gas stations, younger brothers bedrooms, dorm rooms). A cleaning of all the gunk lying around would do wonders. This is the also true for our insides too.

• The soluble fiber gets into your bloodstream and scrubs it up. Can you say, "Adios, Heart Attack!" It can also help reign in blood sugar levels from spiking or falling, as well as lower blood cholesterol levels. Oatmeal does this too.
• The insoluble fiber does the same for your small and large intestines. Scrub, Scrub.

Yes, I know this is not the most appealing thing to think about, but there is one very important positive thing that comes from talking about our gut, and the stuff that moves through it.
The more (and the more regular) that stuff comes out of you...the skinnier you become! Come on, get the benefit of a flatter belly without the sit-ups!
Am I saying that you'll look like a supermodel if you eat an apple a day...no.
But it will help in the ongoing war of the expanding belly syndrome.

Oh, and there are also other good things that can occur too in your gut, like helps prevent hemorrhoids, and diverticulitis- which is a word to make doctors sound important that means your gut gets pooched out where it shouldn't, and guess what that pouch if full of. Ewww!

That's just from eating regular old apples raw!

What about if you start doing those goofy things that herbalists like to do, like turning it into tea and such?

Well, homemade stewed fruit (applesauce) is great at helping patch up diarrhea in children. You must use the full fruit though, apple juice won't have the same effect because so much of the good stuff has been strained out and replaced with sugar. (Story of our lives)

Homemade juice can be mixed with a little olive oil, for cleaning and healing cuts and scrapes.

Sour apples work as a diuretic (makes you pee more when you are bloated). It also helps with Urinary Tract Infections. Break out some peanut butter (or caramel) and dig in! That is a great reason to have one as a snack!

Make a strong tea of a raw apple to ease Rheumatic pains (help for the very old), Colic (the very young), and Feverish Colds (those of us stuck in the middle of cold and flu season).

I'm going to admit, I'm just as astounded as you. Now I like tea, but it never occurred to me that you can make a tea of apples!
But I guess if spas can have their luxury cucumber water. What's stopping me from heating it up a little and trying it for myself? I know what my morning tea will be tomorrow! Huzzah for new experiences!

So embrace the everyday herbs around us, like apples. Hiding in plain sight, as average Clark Kents of the world, when in fact they are such a super food when they take off their black rimmed glasses.

Now, like any drug advertisement, I should mention the negative side effects of this dangerous, untested psuedo-medical drug called apples.
If taken in copious amounts, apples may cause-Farting. 
Yup, pretty much the worst thing that can happen is you start to become musical...on the wrong end. If you are concerned about this, please do not eat a dozen apples before a first date, or interview.

Happy Herb-ing!